Effectively remove feelings of guilt, shame and anxiety with this secular response-based therapeutic device. Agnostics, atheists, and followers of religions without dogma-guided guilt expiation platforms can finally seek relief from the painful burden of negative self worth.
let us begin

You Are Forgiven

Why do you feel bad?

Something I did.
Something I didn't do.
I don't know.

Can't you think of any reason you might feel guilty?

Perhaps something I did.
Perhaps something I did not do.
I feel as though I should be a better person.
There is no reason I should feel guilty.

How could you be a better person?

I could be less self centered.
I could do more for others.
I could be less annoying.
I am as good as I could be.

How could you be less annoying?

I could show interest in others.
I could be less abrasive.
I could stop whining so much.
I’m not sure.

Try to focus right now on how you can be less annoying to other people. Think of a few concrete ways to go about this.

Progress to Forgiveness

Please focus right now on a few small, concrete ways you can do more for other people in your life at this moment.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Ironically, the obsessive focus on yourself is a tool you can use to become less self-centered. Please try, right now, to focus on the welfare of your nearest friends and those who you have been neglecting of late.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Do you regret not doing this?

Yes, I caused someone pain.
Yes, I neglected a duty.
Yes, I wasn’t paying attention.
No, I don’t regret it.
Yes, but I was physically unable to change what happened.

Then why do you feel guilty?

People are mad at me.
I don’t know.

Do they have a right to be mad?

No.
Yes.

Then you have nothing to feel guilty about. Their misunderstanding is not your burden. You can try to enlighten others or not, but don’t feel bad about it.

Progress to Forgiveness.

They have a right to be mad but you did the right thing?

Yes.
It’s more complicated than that.
Perhaps I didn’t do the right thing.

I don’t think you are being honest with yourself. Let’s start over from the beginning.

Start over.

This is a difficult position to be in. However, if you’re sure you acted appropriately in this situation, you have nothing to feel guilty about. Please focus on reasons why you did the right thing over these next few seconds.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Why do you think this happened?

I was thinking of myself.
I am just forgetful.
I was focusing on the wrong thing.
Events prevented me from doing it.

Do you think this was out of genuine selfishness or carelessness?

Selfishness.
I am usually not like that. It was a momentary lapse.

Then you did make a mistake. But you seem to understand the causes and you’re aware that your carelessness has caused problems for yourself and others. Please focus for the next few seconds on ways you can be more vigilant so that something similar doesn’t happen in the future.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Being forgetful isn’t really an excuse. You understand that, right?

Yes, but I will honestly try to be better in the future.
No, it’s really a medical problem.
I’m just forgetful.

If your forgetfulness is a genuine medical concern, you should make an appointment with a doctor immediately. Please inform those around you that you are going to address this issue, when you apologize for any trouble you have caused them.

Progress to Forgiveness.

How much pain?

I hurt feelings with my negligence.
I hurt feelings with my honest behavior or attitude.
Someone was physically hurt.

Was this honesty cruel on your part, or was it something that would have to come out eventually anyway?

Perhaps I was being mean.
A little of both.
Feelings would have to be hurt eventually.

Please think over the next few seconds about how you can more gently make your true feelings known so that people are not inordinately hurt by your honesty.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Have you had any alcohol or recreational drugs in the past week or so?

No.
Yes.
Not really...

You might also have a chemical imbalance. Exercise every day, monitor your diet, and see a physician. Either way, you are not to blame for your feelings.

okay

Refrain from alcohol and drugs for two weeks. Also get more exercise and monitor your diet.

okay

For the next few seconds, try turning the negativity that you feel against itself. These bad feelings are free-floating value judgements without meaning or purpose.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Try to focus for the next few seconds on seeing the world from the point of view of the people who have to deal with you every day. Think of some concrete ways your behavior can be more appealing to them.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Are you sure you aren’t just lonely and want more attachment to others?

What’s the difference?
No, I am actually kind of self centered.
Maybe I am just feeling unloved today.

Then you have nothing to feel guilty about. It is easy to confuse generalized anxiety or loneliness with feelings of guilt. Try to focus for the next few seconds on constructive steps you can take to make your day to day life more interesting.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Loneliness is something that is wrong with you, not your relation to other people. Focus for the next few seconds on ways you can take a more active role in the world around you, rather than the people in it.

Progress to Forgiveness.

What was wrong with your action?

It was just selfish.
It was mean-spirited or vengeful
I caused someone pain.
It was illegal.
It was immoral.
Other people disapprove.

How bad was it?

terrible.
pretty bad.
I just shouldn’t behave like that.

Do you think you need to apologize to anyone for this?

Yes.
No.
Who would I apologize to?

That’s not for me to say. You should be able to tell if an apology is necessary.

I suppose one is, but circumstances make that impossible.
I do know who I might apologize to.
I really don’t think I need to apologize.

But you regret this behavior, sincerely?

Yes.
No.

Will you make a concerted effort to avoid making a similar mistake?

Yes.
probably not...

Then the guilt you feel is only going to continue.

Focus for the next few moments on the behavior that lead to your engaging in this selfish behavior and think of ways to avoid it in the future.

Progress to Forgiveness

Why not?

It wouldn’t do any good.
They would only get more angry
I already apologized.
It is literally impossible.

You sure you’re not just scared to apologize?

Yes, it would really make things worse.
Maybe I’m just scared.
I don’t know.

You need to come to a decision on whether or not an apology is the right thing. If someone had done something similar to you, would you feel better after an apology?

Yes.
No.

Well, before you can feel better you need to apologize. Come back after you’ve done this to the best of your ability. But try not to make it all about you, okay? Apologies are about the people you’re talking to.

Were other people hurt physically or emotionally?

Physically hurt.
No.
Emotionally.

That’s good. Is your life irrevocably destroyed?

Yes.
No.

That’s also good. Do you sincerely regret your selfish act?

Yes.
No.
I don't know.

This has nothing to do with whether your actions are right or wrong. Do you think what you did was wrong?

Yes.
No.
I'm not sure.

Before you can feel better you have to decide once and for all whether your actions are wrong or if other people simply think they are. Figure that out and then come back if you still feel bad.

Well, illegality is a civic concept. Did you cause someone else pain?

Yes.
No.

But you regret breaking the law because it was immoral?

Yes.
No.

Then why do you feel bad?

I embarrassed myself or others.
It ended up costing a lot of money.
It was just selfish on my part.
I may go to jail.

Well stupid behavior like that is a pretty good reason to feel bad about yourself. But do you sincerely regret this behavior?

Yes.
No.
I don't know.

Well, isn’t that punishment enough for your bad behavior?

I suppose so...
Nothing is punishment enough.

Please; let’s not get too dramatic. No one other than yourself was hurt. For the next few seconds, concentrate on your genuine regret.

Progress to Forgiveness

Did you hurt someone’s feelings?

Oh, more than that...
Yes.
No, but I still feel bad.
I just made myself look like an idiot.

Lashing out at others is a sign of poor self control. Everyone feels flashes of anger and regret. But not expressing the immediate anger helps prevent the regret.

Don’t you think I know that?
I am really trying to work on this.
I feel as though I should be a better person.
That’s just the way I was born.

You are selling yourself short, or just being lazy. Do you sincerely regret this expression of anger or spite?

Yes, of course.
Not realy. I just feel guilty.

Please focus for the next few seconds on the triggers that tend to cause your outbursts of anger or your feelings of spite. Remembering that these are outside influences and that you have control over how you relate to them will help to avoid similar behavior in the future.

Progress to Forgiveness.

Pretty bad is a little vague. A bad selfish act can cover many things. How many people were hurt physically or mentally by your behavior?

One.
A few.
Many.
None

Why was it immoral?

Other people tell me it is.
I was dishonest in my behavior.
I caused emotional or physical pain.

Well, it isn’t really. Did you or did you not do the right thing in this given circumstance?

I did.
I did not.
I don't know.

But you sincerely regret this?

Yes.
No.

No, that’s being selfish. Anyone can change. Don’t you think you can make an effort to be less ‘forgetful’?

Yes, you’re right. I will.
No; it’s a genetic or medical issue with me.
Stop nagging me. You’re just a computer program.

Take the next few seconds and think about some simple, concrete ways you can appear to be less forgetful when it comes to these issues. Focusing on the current welfare of friends and relatives can do wonders for your memory.

Progress to Forgiveness.

So you are definitely going to make an effort to improve this?

Yes.
Probably...
No.

Things are rarely that bad, and frankly, people get tired of constant complaints. Try to focus for the next few seconds on the positive qualities of your life. If you have genuine problems that are bothering you, think of active solutions for them.

Progress to Forgiveness